Skip to main content

Xmas story (not for kids)

 


JUSTICE


Santa's dead. Yep. Sorry kids, but the fucker had it coming. 

Judgmental prick. Why does he get to decide who has been good or bad? Fat cunt.

How can he define what's good or bad? There is no clear line I can see.

Good boys. Bad boys. Good girls. Bad girls. It’s all same.

If I took on such a monumental task. I would need advisors, lawyers, and a slew of guidelines.

In my capacity, I would judge Santa as bad. This category would be listed under Slave Owner and Prisoner Guard. After all, he has many elves working for him and they are forced to live in his compound called The North Pole. There is little heat, no Internet, and no television.

Such horrid conditions. And I doubt they get paid for all the toys they make under his iron fist.

That skanky hoe, Mrs. Claus would be in on it too. She comes across all sweet and lovely. The image of a perfect grandma. I bet she runs the electric chair, demands obedience and cracks the whip when Santa is outside abusing his reindeer.

There is a reason Rudolf's nose is red. And no, it's not what you think. I have a satellite video of him hanging reindeer on barbwire and sliding on a pair of boxing gloves.

In the video, he is speaking, but his words are inaudible. Let's just assume it's nefarious.

Santa would list you as bad for thinking those thoughts about him and Rudolf. Your stocking will overflow with coal so Daddy can use it to heat the house.

Fuck you and fuck your Christmas. Ho-ho-ho. 

Mrs. Claus is gutted in the kitchen. The bitch was about to eat a gingerbread man who screamed for mercy. The elves are using her intestines as a jump rope. I think they've ever had so much fun.

Santa the fucker is dead at my feet. He didn't hear me creep up in the snow.

Asshat was busy packing a getaway sleigh. The blade drew deep through his layers of flesh and the red sleigh shines now. Tomorrow the red will be brown.

The North Pole sweat factory is closed for good. The elf slaves are free. It will take time to integrate them back into society. It can be done. It will be done.

Justice is served.

You're welcome.

End



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

For Fantasy Writers

 This even has ended.  Fantasy Writing Master Techniques Everything you need to add depth and texture to your fantasy stories Next week, ProWritingAid is hosting its first ever Fantasy Writer's Week, a series of events with fantasy experts who will help you develop and strengthen your writing process. To get you in the fantasy-writing mood, we've collected our best fantasy writing articles together in this newsletter.  Writing a fantasy novel isn't easy. With far-reaching plots, large character casts and vast worlds that you'll build from the metaphorical ground up, there's a lot to consider before you start writing.  This can be daunting, but don't worry! Keep reading to find detailed guides to help you create convincing characters, immerse your reader in your world and even create whole new species. We also get into the nitty-gritty of outlining and plotting your novel.  Whatever stage of the fantasy writing process you're at, there's something here f...

Pen Names

Hello all, I'm debating on whether or not to us a pen name for my crime novels. You see, way back in 2001 when I made my first sale, I used the name Richard Lee ( http://threeand10.com ). In 2009 a publisher of my second novel, The Last Church convinced me to use my real name. Although I announced the name change to my massive Ning group, MySpace and Twitter, not a lot of people took notice and The Last Church didn't sell as well as it should have with the Richard Lee brand. I had no idea about branding back then. Now, I do. In 2015, I returned to write under the Richard Lee brand and some comments I got were: I wondered what happened to you. Welcome back, Dude.  Missed you. Are you still writing? etc. My books now sell in several languages. Richard Lee wrote horror and science fiction (usually blended together).  Now that I'm writing crime, ( http://www.thriller.nz ) I decided to switch to my real name, and start crime fiction branding (no idea how to do that). But, now I...

Mystery, Thriller, and Crime Novels: What’s the Difference?

While closely related, crime novels, mystery novels, and thrillers are not synonymous genres. Each has its own idiomatic characteristics and attracts a specific audience. What Are the Elements of a Crime Novel? 3 Popular Crime Subgenres The 6 Elements of a Mystery Novel? 5 Popular Mystery Subgenres What Are the Elements of a Thriller Novel? 4 Popular Thriller Subgenres To read about all these categories, you need to pop over to a Masterclass website (linked below) to read the 5 minute article.  https://www.masterclass.com/articles/mystery-thriller-and-crime-novels-whats-the-difference#4-popular-thriller-subgenres